Ben & Balon Ikan

Hari ini, Papa beliin Ben balon ikan badut. Setiap hari Papa ngelewatin si penjual balon helium di Pasar Mandalika, jadi kepengin beliin bocah kesayangannya balon itu, tapi pasti repot banget kalau harus bawa ke kantor dulu. Masak Papa mau diliatin orang sepanjang jalan dia ngegowes sampe ke kantor? Jadi, pagi tadi Papa pun ngajakin Mama & Ben gowes ke Mandalika buat beli balon helium.

 Papa pilih balon ikan badut, a.k.a Nemo, warna merah, seharga 10 ribu rupiah. Si abang balon tak lupa mengikatkan sebongkah batu kecil sebagai penahan balon.

Ben's milestones in recap

Waktu masih bayi sekali, setiap kali Ben nangis, gw selalu usahain langsung nyamperin dia. Suatu kali, dia menangis minta nenen - umurnya belum seminggu waktu itu, gw agak terlambat ngegendong dia, dan begitu I scooped him into my arms, tiba-tiba dia mendelik gitu ke gw sambil nangis kenceng. Tatapan matanya waktu itu seakan-akan bilang, "Ke mana aja sih?? Lama banget!!" :p

Kejadian itu sangat berkesan, masih gw inget betul hingga sekarang si baby udah 2 tahun 2 bulan lebih. Mungkin itu jadi salah satu hal yang bikin gw yakin, Ben anak yang tahu apa yang dia mau, gak perlu dipaksa, he knows his limit.

Agak lebay ya, hihi. Tapi yah, entah kenapa, gw percaya hal itu.

Ketika masih di bawah 6 bulan dan belum makan, Ben terhitung underweight. Badannya kurus, kecil, tapi aktif luar biasa. Pertumbuhannya juga oke. Dan begitu masuk waktunya makan, boom! Seolah-olah dia dipompa (istilah temen deket gw yang liat dia waktu itu), berat badannya melesat naik. Ah, gw jadi ingat, kalo malem-malem gw liat dia yang masih kurus kecil, rasanya susah banget hati gw, dan seperti ada suara yang ngomong dalam hati gw, "Don't worry, Mama. I'll be alright, I'm doing fine." :')

At least I've tried :/

So.

Out of genuine concern, positive thinking that we were once close, I decided to contact him, asking how he is in the midst of the chaos in his city.

His replies were... well, not that dry actually, only, not really encouraging. We were like doing Q&A session, added with some "hehe".

And I didn't bother to elongate the conversation. Enough.

We are back to strangers, like the night in 2003, the first time we met. Only, you were more excited that time.

Anyway, what do the say? Time flies, people change. Indeed.

Changing theme - again

Cause that's what  I love to do :p

For a steady person, I'm quite fond of changes, in some aspects. I would love to try new menu, for example, thing that is a nightmare for some people I know.

And of course, changing blog or phone themes like this.

Guess I'm not that steady :)

a decade of a broken heart

I don't know why it's getting stronger recently.

Every night, you come crawling into my mind.  Flipping open the memory, torturing me with the warm feeling I once had every time we were talking. Yet, every conversation, every sweet gestures of yours would be swept away once I recalled this sentence:

"No, there's nothing going on between us."