When it hurts too much that you can't even hold onto your hope,
sometimes it helps to close your eyes and recall all those good ol' memories,
for somehow, they will keep you alive.

Wandering away in those sweet memories, might help you to forget the pain.

Fingers-crossed.

Review Film "Merantau"

Semalem nonton film ini sama suami. Gara-garanya si suami kelaperan tengah malem dan minta diambilin roti di bawah. Gw ajak aja turun sekalian, nonton, tar gw buatin teh tarik, oleh-oleh dari si Dodot dari Thailand. Suami langsung setuju, dan jadilah kita midnight movie time.

the song (1)

"Suatu hari nanti, aku akan menulis banyak lagu, dan yang menyanyikannya adalah penyanyi-penyanyi terkenal di Indonesia, di dunia!"

Aku tersenyum. Kau selalu percaya diri seperti itu. Dan aku selalu tersihir dengan keyakinanmu, membuatku percaya akan segala mimpi-mimpimu, bahwa kau benar-benar bisa menjadi seperti yang kau inginkan. Ketika kau bilang kau sangat suka memasak, aku percaya kau bisa jadi koki ternama negeri ini. Ketika kau bilang kau mengidolakan Agnes Monica, aku percaya Agnes akan tergila-gila padamu jika dia mengenalmu. Ya. Sedalam itulah rasa percayaku padamu.

"Dan aku akan menulis satu lagu untukmu, Shir."

mirror

He's only been 2,5 years old. Or 2 years, 6 months and 4 weeks old, to be exact.

Yet, he has taught me a lot more about Father God than what I learned since I decided to be a Christian.

When he was a lot younger... Every time he cried, I would flee to check on him. He didn't have to ask, I would always provide him.

And that's exactly what Father does for me.

When I thought all my rebukes had gone in vanish, he would surprise me by reciting what I had told him and doing exactly what I told him.

Oh, how many times do I neglect His rebukes and how broken His heart would be!

When he grew bigger and started to challenge whatever I told him...

When he kept walking away and wouldn't coming back to me, and how I secretly and half-heartedly wished that he would fall down so he would cry and return to me and I could hold him back...

Or like what he is up to now, wanting to do everything by himself, includes things that could be dangerous for him, while stubbornly refuse any help...

I can see myself clearly in the mirror of that cute face.

And I'm stunned by how great His love is for me.

Thank you, Father God.